3 cheers for all idiots

WOW. if 3 idiots doesnt touch hearts with its humour and wit it will surely touch lives with its intelligence. This has to be India's finest in a long long time - perhaps since Lagaan way back in 2001. This is as fabulous as movies are meant to be without relying on frame enhancing technology or trick photography. Its EQ is as high as its IQ. Kudos!

Mere paas Paa hai..

Saw Paa yesterday and liked it for reasons completely different from what are being espoused across disparate media.

The movie breaks away from the cliched in several ways. Right from the credits roll out to the way the characters are conceived and portrayed. Credits being read out as opposed to flashing past was novel. So were the way the characters were defined and etched. Very rooted, very strong and very credible. Another departure from the tried and tested was the lighting - or rather the inter-play of light n shade through almost three quarters of all sequences in the film. This chiaroscuro was infact very reminicsent of Guru dutt and earlier RK films. A big newness was the refreshing and unaffected maner in which kids talked of their relationship with their parents. Precouscious - maybe but melodramatic - no way. And most definitely enjoyable ! The dialogue throughout and specifically in the scenes with the kids was witty. And last but not the least - despite their individual spark and brilliance, the chemistry between Amitabh and Abhishek was that of two competent performers. Nothing radically significant really. A huge thumbs up for Vidya Balan though. She was genuinely good. Despite its underlying pathos, the film was neither preachy nor weepy or senti. And it worked. It was surely, one happy world worth walking through !!

The ultimate weapon

So much has happened over the past 3 months - in the public space. and yet not a single word from me only highlights my complete lack of motivation to pick up the threads and tie them in as well as the fuzziness in my own head..

Sachin completing 20 yrs in international cricket - would have loved to believe - is akin to me completing 18 in my work life - just that the bugles in my backyard are more muted and celebrations absent! after all unlike him, i havent helped India gain recognition or prominence nor have i got TV ratings to soar or got a nation into collective frenzy.

Amitabh doing an Auro with the gay abandon of a pre-adoloscent 12 yr old reminds you that even when age has taken its toll and all good things seem to be waning- true class does manage to rise like the proverbial phoenix.

Rahul Gandhi emerging as the most unlikely hero - i remember running him down in one of my earlier posts - has surprised me perhaps much more than most things would. Now, as i overcome the cliched idea of heroes, i have come to appreciate his bashfulness, his demeanour and importantly the clear articulation of his simple thoughts and the stances he takes on most issues- i stand converted!

about 3 weeks ago - as i watched Ratan Tata inaugurate a charity in the memory of those who were killed in the 26/11 carnage, couldnt help but notice his tear filled eyes and the shiver in his voice. This wasnt a choreographed act and seemed to stem from genuine concern for the families of those impacted. Here was a corporate citizen promising to take care of the families of his ex employees like they would have, had they been alive. To me, if this isnt benevolence, nothing is! And if true role models still exist- here is one guy, God must aim to replicate.

Ever wondered, whats common to all these guys? Though its too pre-mature to club or force-fit Rahul Gandhi into the same league, the one stand out trait between all of them seems to be extreme humility and respect for others before self apart from single minded pursuit of perfection in their chosen areas.

Now only if Mayawati, Ambani, the "Khans" and more recently Tiger and others of his ilk could absorb this, just as comfortably!

Book, who me?

Over the last few days, a strange thought has overtaken my mind.
Its about penning my own book! the thought is as inspiring as it is scary.
Unfortunately i havent been able to get it out if mind. The topics there. The knowledge, skill, perseverence and single mindedness ?- well i dont know. will figure out soon.

Filtered vision

Wonder why everyone that one interacts with wears blinkers at most times. Every word that is uttered, every move made is critically viewed and evaluated for what it could be conveying or camoflauging rather than what it simply is.

Possible reasons?

Guess it has to do with perception of risk to self or to ones business; simple mistrust of others other than self borne out of past memories especially when one actually got hoodwinked and at a deeper level the desire to prevail always - to prove that one can do no wrong, that one is right while others are trying to be smart.

The world could be so much simpler to deal with if we could just let go and allow unbridled freeflow of thought and feeling to dominate our interactions - even with business colleagues.

It would ensure faster decision making, better bonhomie and a feeling of mutual respect, making even small accomplishments seem nice.

And yes, there could actually be a smart alec lurking somewhere trying to hoodwink. But 9 times out of 10, the universe would take care of it.

Good guys win too!

Fedex showed that neither age nor a surfeit of titles has diminished his hunger for more. His fire still rages as vigorously as ever and is the stuff inspirations are made of. Kudos to him for rightfully and gracefully scaling the peak!

The greatness of this wimbeldon duel was that though Federrer deservingly won his 15th SLAM, Roddick never lost! He played like a true and possessed champion himself.

Just a couple of years ago, when Aggassi-Sampras ruled, i used to be a die hard fan of Sampras. Had never thought that some one, so much like him, would actually overtake him so soon.

The one striking similarity between both Federrer and Sampras is their earnestness and the intensity that they demonstrate on the tennis court. It isnt just their job. It is their attitude, their on-court behaviour, their healthy respect for their opponents and their lack of starry tantrums or boorish behaviour - the kind McEnroe or Aggasi were known for, that stands out time and again. Though a little more flamboyance would have made for good TV viewing, it is the lack of it that makes both these guys stand so tall.

Every time i see them both, my belief that Good guys win too, stands re-enforced!

Who's the dumbest of 'em all?

Statue, statue on the wall,
who is the dumbest of 'em all?
behenji, behenji, behenji it has to be
for building monoliths on and on.

Her white overalls lending grace
diamonds shining through the stone,
trendy shoes on her feet
and voila ! a handbag firmly in place!
but can anything ever match
the innate wickedness on her face!?

Her weird weird attempts to lasso
glory, grandeur & greatness
to create a physical halo
around herself
are just getting so crass!

Only if, this megalomania
had many a mouth fed
or housed the poor
cutting across race,
statues would 've been redundant
for junta to worship the stage;
the messiah that led them
from indignity, filth and despair
to safety, hope and care!

When the living are dumb
With their brains in the bum
statues only unveil
the absence of thought,
and the absence of rationale.

The roar is back

I got up this morning to hear what i had been waiting for! the roar of the monsoon.
after much delay, parched earth and water cuts, it was nice to see the silvery blue getting thickly clouded. Razor sharp showers accompanying the roar cut through frowns, sliced away worries and spliced open oodles of joy and cheer.

Rachu dextrously re-arranged the windows to save the furniture from the wafting water while allowing the breeze to come in. The playful romance of this breeze was as intoxicating as the waterdroplets carried by the wind to our room. In one stroke, the spirit was rejuvenated, my steps had a spring and the lilt in my voice, unmistakeable.

Thank God for his little mercies. And for always showing us what all, only he can do to re-instil hope, perpetuate "feel goodness" and inspire us - when we need it!

Dont Screw tll you can!!

Choices abound when it comes to disciplining erring employees. But they all come with several strings attatched! Just a cursory glance at the list below reveals multiple options that have differing impacts on the concerned individual as well as on rest of the team.

a) just letting 'em have it - in the presence of others. Embarrass the guy, make him squirm.
b) well targeted artillery fire in private so that the world can be spared his agony.
c) question, probe, question,question, probe for days on end till the guy feels pressurised to alter behaviour
d) load him with so much work that he knows that somethings wrong
e) Write nasty mails with the world on cc and say nothing when you cross one another
f) take away his responsibilities and load it onto others
g) polite, docile fact based discussion

wanting to keep your team members in high spirits, motivated and charged for the tasks on hand is often a big challenge as intrinsically it is difficult to motivate people who are not firedup themselves. It's like expecting fuel less rockets to soar up skywards. But tolerating mediocre performance is as tricky for it directly contradicts with what you would like to achieve for the business. And then there is the even more contradictory stance when one doesnt like the thought of loosing team members because of the impact this has on the morale of the rest of the team. So what does one do?
I had tried several routes and not seen them deliver. The route i recently took was (e) except that instead of the world, only the HR deptt was on cc followed by a pretension of (f) and (b).

The pretence was necessary to instil the fear of God in a guy who had the ability but not the attitude. My genuine concern was to improve his performance level and to send out the right signals to the rest of the team watching in anticipation, waiting for my first stumbling block.
I am confident, he will change. If he does, it will be the organisation's victory. and mine too.

Giver of all thingz good, bad and ugly

Forever, we have believed that the giver of all thingz good is God himself. Then who is it that gives us the bad, the ugly and the terrible ?Guess, the anwser lies buried deep somewhere in the mind that often tricks us into seeing ourselves as targeted victims or as objects being tested by GOD.
What we tend to loose in such times, is not the material or social wealth that we may have garnered but faith, patience and strength in our own belief about the supremacy of the ultimate power.
It is the mind that exaggerates the importance of such material and physical wealth and overhypes our body reaction to its perceived loss or erosion. In effect, it tends to overwrite our innate faith that whatever God wills, is for our benefit. The giver of all things bad and ugly is therefore not the unfortunate circumstance or the scheming individual but the mind that gives it more importance than it deserves!
I have over the years developed a way to psyche myself into believing that I have everything in plenty - money, recognition, love, success, everything..In situations which give me less than expected or take away something unexpectedly, i tend not to worry for i believe that more good will come to me, because it belongs to me and because the Giver of all things good is always with me.

Janta bole Naa toh Naa

Congress surprised itself and others! But what a relief, its been to see every kingmaker cut down to size. Paswan, Lalu, Jaya Amma, Mayawati, Mulayam Singh, Amar Singh, Pawar, Ramadoss, Vaiko, Shibu Soren, even former trouble makers like Bagarappa, AR Antulay and assorted criminals in UP, Bihar, MP- contesting across parties have been either booted out or have come back with diminished mandates! Way to go.

While everybody would like to annoint Rahul G as the latest messiah, I have an interesting take and wd like to point out the role played by the media in general in shaping our collective approach towards politicians, this time around.

These are ads, films and television exposes with political overtones that have been aired over the last 3-4 years. These have sub consciously raised our level of expectation from the political establishement and in a way also influenced our behaviour when it counted.

a) Tata Tea - remember the politician who is accosted by a calm young man and asked for his qualification to run the country !!
b) Idea Cellular - janta bole Naa to Naa.
c) Rang De Basanti - the film with Aamir as protoganist and its unabashed angst against the political class.
d) Crusades run by TV channels (specifically NDTV) towards exposing the politician criminal nexus while covering the BMW case, the Jessical murder trial, etc
e) Lead India and Bleed India campaigns run by TOI.

i think collectively all these gave vent to our cynisim towards politicians and helped formulate a sharper response towards both corrupt politicians as well as those who seek to divide and rule.
And as far as Rahul G is concerned, i still think, Chaddi pahen ke Fool khila hai.....fool khila hai.

Political Supermarket ka entertainment

Welcome to the Indian Political supermarket - where you get all possible creatures of the animal kingdom under one roof.

Beautifully displayed in this great Haat are political animals of all kinds - ranging from asses, horses, buffaloes, vultures, hyneas and tigers. All freshly washed, sorted and neatly lined up. A casual view showcases their fresh and attractive appeal, pleasant demeanour and their colgate smiles. But touch them, feel them, question them and you know their core is nothing but sheer crassness, deadly fangs and gnawing teeth. One moment you observe them making the right diplomatic announcements and overtures, giving the right bytes to the paparazzi and just the next they would be changing colour, contracdicting what they said earlier.

The smiles and cordiality displayed is misleading. Animals like Chiranjeevi (Praja Rajyam), Ramadoss (PMK), Rao (TRS), my favourite Mayawati (BSP), Amar Singh and Mulayam (SP), Deve Gowda (whatever his party is called) and Jaya amma (AIADMK ) can make or break the next 5 years of our country. Each is masquerading as a saviour when he or she is nothing more than a lowly pimp, whoring around to sell his MPs to the highest bidder and promises of political gain in his or her home state.

What is chilling is that not one of them, even vaguely, has an agenda for the country ! Its not that others like the Congress or BJP have one, but atleast they have intellectuals who can cobble up one and can respectfully represent and simultaneously do good for the country.

The fact that we would see another election and a spend of 15-20000 Cr again from the central exchequer within 2 years, at a time when the macro economic environment is floundering, could possibly imply increased prices, increased taxes and an increased cost of living in general. That the government would be spending most of the time in managing its disparate allies and their contradictory demands, would mean reduced time for governance and lower focus on issues that truly matter. Plus there is a real and grave danger of being saddled with less than competent people who could severely compromise the image and face that our country has built over the last couple of years on the world stage.

Meanwhile, for another 7 days or so, this supermarket show will go on. Wares are being lined up for sale. Parties are busy changing the point of sale merchandising - announcing new Buy 1, get1 free offers, new improved pricing and using spit and polish to keep the wares looking attractive. Party bosses have begun shopping. Selected animals are being picked and placed in their shopping carts while some other displayed animals are being turned upside down to check their pricing labels. Some animals after having been purchased are even seen jumping shopping carts.

Actually this is not Politics. This is entertainment masquerading as Politics.

Jarnail Unleashes Shu-nami

The current electoral battle reminds me of a C grade movie. One with C grade actors mouthing tuneless songs, sidekicks unleashing absurd humour and in general an insipid narrative that gets you to either run for cover or produce infectious yawns even before it has started off. Never before has one witnessed an election that is so issue-less, crass or dull. One is continuously being subjected to stale jokes, staler diatribe between the lead protagonists and stinking -sinking standards of political debate.

The only bright spark, one must admit has come from the innovative iraqi who has inspired many a sardaar to perfect the art of gently lobbing a sneaker and making a point, howsoever pointless.

Welcome to the new age journalist indulging in "Jarnailism" when not reporting obscure stories. What Jarnail Singh has unleashed is a virtual "Shu-nami". Within a fortnight, atleast 4 more politicos have been targeted by different brands of shoes in different parts of the country. Am sure that Madhur bhandarkar must be itching to announce a grandiose plan to direct a film around this "historic s(ho)e-ries of events".

While this mega event led to some "has been" politicos being "shoo-ed out", for me, it has served as an inspiration to draft my own list of favourites from diverse fields, who must be "booted out" - figuratively - if we were to save our senses from being continuously assaulted.

• Southern Sleepies : Karunanidhi & devegowda : for being the most ugly political faces on TV.
• the buffalo brigade - Mulayam, Maya and Mamta -for wanting to take India back to the 18th century - sans computers, english, cars,,,........!
• The Sawant shows : Rakhi Sawant - for turning herself into a bigger spectacle by aping Jade Goody. God help her and the guy she gets married to in front of a live TV audience!!
• Sagarika Ghosh, Rajdeep Sardesi and Karan Thapar - for loving their own voices and forgetting why they invite guests to their studios.
• Sonia Gandhi's Hindi or "wiper arm" tactics - dont mind the face or personality. but please i cant see her arm waving tactics and cant bear to hear her for another 5 years

Shoo kar mere man ko kiya tune kya ishaara....

Can more jarnail Singhs please stand up!

Naya job, Purana formula !

As i start a new job, am again faced with the same task that can make or break any stint.
this is the task of gaining acceptance of the people around.
Have earlier in my career had a terrible experience when a superfluous boss deliberately created attrition and friction as a way of creating space for himself within the organisation. He first made judgements about people and then went about justifying them. I later realised that he was one of many who follow this practice and that it was excruciatingly simple to fall into that trap. Today, fortunately i have been able to evolve my own rules.

These are the 6 simple rules of love, of mutual respect and understanding that work as well in real life and love as they work in the corporate world.

a) Dont talk. LISTEN ! -How many times have we heard this and yet we all love the sound of our voices. Take it from me. It is always wonderful to hear others talk. Specially in a new role in an organisation, avoid talking about your past job, role or achievements unless specifically asked. Never ever boast, rather underplay if you can. Talking about yourself raises barriers and prompts even sleeping Johns' to wake up and take a sniggering look. So hold your horses till there is sufficient camraderie and bonding with the team and the team understands you.

b) Dont CRITICIZE - No one is ugly, fat, lazy or dumb! They are all great. Dont look for opportunities to run down the current system and specifically ur predecessor. Restrain yourself Hold the diatribe, because one needs to first understand what the system really is. what makes it tick? survive ? thrive ?

c) BE OBJECTIVE - Dont beat around the bush if you are convinced about your understanding of the system or its practices and need to talk change - just cut out the criticism. Instead, be objective. Focus on what changes will a new proposed system bring in for the organisation. Dont make it people specific.
d) GENEROSITY - Like in life, everyone loves a good gift. Be generous, specifically to your predecessor - not in an artificial way and not to please anybody for sure but because you believe that whatever he did was not prompted by ulterior objectives but because he believed those actions were in the best interest of the organisation. Ur view on those actions could be different but there should be no doubt on the sincerity of purpose behind them. My observation is that the more one gives, the more one receives!!

Recognise the fact that Ur predecessor too could have emotions and sentimental attatchment with this role and maybe some uncertainty about his own future. Be generous to him and plan a grand farewell for him with the rest of the gang. Thats the least he deserves.

e) Have confidence. Give Responsibilty- give small projects with clear responsibilities to those who you think can contribute. It doesnt matter what level they are at. Appreciate little gains. Celebrate.

f) BE POSITIVE. - God created us to be positive, to unite others and to move forward. Never divide the team. On the contrary, create a positive atmosphere that encourages people to think, to stretch while still having fun. Get teams and individuals to understand the role played by others. Get them on the same platform. Communicate !!

and there are 3 more rules - contributed by my friend Susmita - which are just as important

g) WILLINGNESS TO LEARN from peers/juniors who have been in the system for much longer and definitely know more about the category/business/bosses more than you do. Juniors especially provide a lot of information about people and processes as they are usually eager to please and therefore more willing to share. Respect for their knowledge/expertise helps one learn the business much faster.

h) BLEND IN NOT OUT - Go with the crowd in most things( if everybody eats in the canteen and you would prefer ghar ka khana, at least a couple of times a week, go along or take your dabba and eat with them. So, esp for women, if everybody wears salwar kurtas, avoid westerns; if everybody has kids, don't talk about what a pain in the a... you often find them to be.

i) CHARM the HR & FINANCE team - (though am not personally sure of this) - i do see some merit in this. But this could vary from one organisation to the other and the relative importance and visibility of these functions within the organisation.

Over the years have concluded that there is enough and more for each individual to do and to achieve. I believe that as much as all of us, even the universe wants us to succeed. We just need to believe that and have confidence in our own ability and in the capability of the team to spring positive surprises and deliver better results. We need to stop our primal instincts of pettiness, of hatred and of making premature judgements about others. We need to let love, patience and belief take over. Respect for people in the team, aknowledgement of their contribution and an understanding of their working styles, their problems, their styles of thinking, need to be all respected.
This is a fail safe formula to gain acceptance in a new system, a new role and in a new organisation. It guarantees not just entry into the team but a team that gradually learns and adapts to play, laugh and work together minus the stress.

The fading colours of Holi

Every passing year, for the past few years, Holi has turned a damper squib than the previous years. Plummeting rapidly is the excitement, the planning and the sheer joy associated with it. At one level, given that this used to be amongst the two or three biggest festivals for most of India (except in the south), it is indeed shocking. But at another level, it is to be expected. And there are several reasons for that.

Unlike Diwali, Holi doesnt have any linked in commercial aspects. Indians dont buy new clothes for Holi. Houses dont get re-painted and neither do durable purchases happen around the time. No gifting of sweets, dry fruits, chocolates or sundry items happens either. Houses are not decorated for the occassion. Sadly, Holi therefore, lacks relevance for manufacturers and marketeers. Consquently, no advertiser worth his salt (except Parachute hair oil) uses the occassion to sell his products or build hype around it. In the current context, lower hype leads to lower visibility, lower energy, lower consumer desire and therefore a feeling of "whats the loss - if avoided ?." The zing is gone and its not a "must do" anymore.

The relatively weaker religious significance of Holi (as compared to Diwali) is also unfortunately responsible for its fading sheen.

Worse its timing usually coincides with examination season.With every passing year enhancing the "getting hyper quotient" amongst succeeding generation of parents, we have young parents worrying about their kids catching a cold, if drenched in water. Not sitting in judgement here, but it really saddens my heart.

Some of the other reasons seem to be increasingly nuclear families and absence of large posse of friends and family -who are in the same unabashed mood of celebration that you would like to be in and which is so critical for a festival like this. Somehow, your real friends never seem to be with you and there is always a smoke screen with those who are with you.

An increasing number of people also have decided that they dislike this festival, not necessarily for any concrete reason. Some dont like being touched or coloured. Proliferation of prudes and stand-offish-ness, for a celebration that can be such a source of joy - is annoying.

Even bollywood - the barometer of Indian cultural trends - has stopped eulogising Holi now. "Hori khele raghuveera awadh mein" from i think "baghban" -was a good 6-7 years ago. Also, gone are the wild parties at RK Studios and Bachchan's mansion.

It is therefore almost destined that some years down the road, Valentines day, Mothers and Fathers day celebrations would be bigger and more colourful than our own festivals like Holi, unless 4-5 Indian corporates can find reason enough to latch onto this festival and promote it over a continuous period of 8-10 years.

Else, while some of us would continue to live with sparkling & colourful memories of family and friendly bonding over Gulal, buckets of coloured water, gubbarre, gujiya and thandai, the evolving generation would be too busy with their blackberrys, presentations or sundry other colourless activities to bother anyways. "Tollees of friends spreading cheer, goodwill and creating everlasting memories of bonhomie" seem headed for extinction.

We risk loosing a source of joy, togetherness, bonding and a lifetime of memories. That to me is reason enough to try and lead the change. I am as guilty of not being in the forefront and not celebrating it with as much zest in the last few years. But i do see my mistake.really.
From now on, i am clear. I will plan for, play and celebrate it like never before. That, i guess is the only way to preserve it for my children.

Pol(l)e Dance

"Aa Dekhen Zara, kisme kitna hai dam, jam ke rakhna kadam, mere saathiya...aaaa!"

No, this aint about the latest film release or cricket match. This is a bollywood inspired, tongue in cheek, dekko at the once in every 5 year charade called Polls.

To enjoy this, you need to sing the songs and graphically imagine what is described...

Poll Dates have been announced. Weary Congressmen are re-doing their poll calculations, knowing that that they stand little chance on their own. Standing outside the pearly gates of 10 Janpath, their light hum is turning into a raucous chorus...

Scene 1 : Congress HQ - Congressmen move to the beat of - "Chal, Chal, Chal mere Haathi, o mere saathi, chal le chal khataara kheench ke, chal yaar dhakka maar..............."

Sonia is however busy. Very Busy. She needs to go on national television with a seemingly improptu speech about Rahul Jee. For this momentous occasion she is memorising "jangal, jangal baat chali hai, pata chala hai, chaddi pehen ke "fool" khila hai, "fool" khila hai.."
(you have to sing this sonia style)

Scene 2 : Sonia knows that to win, she must find allies -like or unlike minded (doesnt matter !). As she glances on the India map, her brows raised and mind in turmoil, out pops Mehbooba Mufti from J&K -
"Kashmir ki kali hoon mein, mujhse na rootho sonia jee, murjha gayi toh phir na khiloongee, kabhi nahin, kabhi nahin, kabhi nahin." This warning is to ostensibly prevent sonia from cosying up to the newest blue eyed baba called Omar.
Sonia decides to reward Mehbooba for her singing skills with a Pre Poll alliance and keeps Omar in the bag for a possible post poll affair as afterall, blue eyed kashmiri baba is her "chaddi fools'" good friend.
Scene 3 : with 1 in her bag, she now turns to UP, where there are two or perhaps more in the bush. She first sets her gaze on "Massakali" - the proverbial pigeon (and my favourite buffalo) amongst politicians - Maya. But Maya is Maya. She is content dancing all by herself as the background music reverberates
" Massakali, o massakali, ud matak-kali, matakkali, zara bam ko jhatak, thodi dhool atak, thoda lachak, machak ke door bhatak, kasbe kooche, gali, nukkad mein poori karle dil kee tamanna, hawa mein ud, itadi se mur, aur ud jaa furr furr"

She doesnt as much as even acknowledge Sonia's presence. Sonia decides to get even and orders the latest CBI case traps to ground this high flying pigeon.

Just as she is doing this, she hears the strains of Mulayam and Amar's voices coming from behind the bushes..
Jaane Jaan, dhoonta phir raha, hoon tumhe raat din, tum kahan,
sonia - mein yahan, tum kahan ? Mujhko awaaz do....

They finally meet. But the meeting is vitriolic. Sonia is clear that she wants more seats. She approaches Raj babbar, Ajit Singh & some disgruntled SP partymen and even wants to open parleys with massakali ...
a bitter Mulayam wails out aloud - "O haseena zulfon waali, jaane jahan, dhoondti hain kaafir ankhen kiska nishan, mehfil-mehfil o shama..phirti ho kahan..."
Sonia -"mein deewana dhoondti hoon..... woh parwana dhoondti hoon"
till news last came in - they were still playing antakshari.

Scene 4 - With the disappointment of UP still plaguing her, Sonia moves on to Bihar - where Lalu waits for her with baited breath. Just as he sights her, he breaks into verse -
"Sau saal pehle, hamein tumse pyaar tha, hamen tumse pyaar tha, aaj bhi hai aur kal bhi rahega". With Lalu and clan jumping on their own into her bag, Sonia finally smiles that elusive smile.
Scene 5 : She wastes no time and hops on to West Bengal where the task is decidedly tougher.

This calls for more than a song. She knows she herself will have to shake a leg.
"Jitne bhi too kar le sitam, Has has ke sahenge ham. Yeh pyaar no hoga kam, mamta teri kasam, ooo sanam teri kasam."

Mamta is many times bitten, but never shy. She understands that if she has to match the Red brigade, she needs some strong Italian shoulders to stand on and that this could be her make or break chance in national politics. She obliges and cajoles Sonia to perform the ultimate item song together in Kolkata - The music begins..
Dola, dola re, dola re, dola re, do, lahi do laavan doh, lai doh..dola."
(this is sonia and mamta in white sarees with red borders, jigging in tandem against a red backdrop in down town Kolkatta)
The heavy duty synchronized choreography of these two virtually shakes up the red bastion for once. They all seem worried, harried and stirred..
But just as that scene is unfolding, Sonia seems to have trouble with her favourite sharad pawar. he seems to have stuck a dostana with some sena types in maharashtra.

Scene 6 : She watches in open mouthed horror as Sharad gyrates to "Maa ka laadla bigad gaya, munda saada doli chad gaya, band baj gaya..."while bal, uddhav and gang join the dance fest as baraatis.... She knows, this dostana can be fatal and needs to be halted NOW.
She pushes a soother down his mouth and before you know it, the scene changes to reveal sonia in her most matronly avataar singing the eternal lullaby-
"sooraj hai too, mera chanda hai too, O meri aankhon ka taara hai too..."
As she drops Sharad in her bag and departs, you see him pop his head out of the bag, and knowingly wink at Bal thakeray, almost saying, i will be back buddy.

Scene 7 : Sonia meanwhile moves to chennai to have "filtar caffee" with her old pal Karunanidhi. Our man rises to the occassion to perform with earnestness - "Hamein Kaale hain to kya hua, dilwaale hain...hum tere tere tere chahne waale hain" . This expected result relaxes sonia. As she congratulates Karuna for his fine dancing skills, the southern spice, the buxom J.Lalitha breaks into an improptu "Mungda" , just outside the door.
"Mungda, Mungda, mein gud ki dali, mangti hai toh aaja sonia, naahi toh mein toh chali.."
hinting that she wd not be averse to tying up with the NDA.

Sonia is no masochist. She is clear that she cant inflict more pain on herself than what Mamta, Sharad and her "partners in the bush" in UP will give her. She ignores the Mungda for now, but promises to watch the spicy show exclusively, post elections.

Scene 8 : The BJP camp in comparison is a a picture of disarray. The party-wallas have pulled out their old warhorse - Advani -and are busy beating it to shape...
"lakdi ki kaathi, kaathi pe ghoda, ghode ki dum pe jo maara hathora, daura, daura, daura ghora...dum daba ke daura"

But everytime they seem to put a nail in his backside, the ghora (war horse) sets off on a tangent - "Mein nikla gaddi (Rath Yatra) leke, o sarak pe, raste mein, ik Ram mandir aaya, mein utthe dil chhod aaya.."
He is incorrigible. He is still talking of ayodhya. His party's record has got stuck on 26/11, though. Most of the earlier allies seem uncomfortable with this ghora.
Scene 9 : Assorted Filmstars have just discovered their love for India and for the country's poor. They are busy reconstructing the lives of their mothers / fathers/Uncles / aunties / brothers / in laws/ Chachas and Chachis to figure where their clan could have spent some weeks and months of their lives and whether contesting from a particular constituency could be termed homecoming and a tribute to their family.
All stars - including Sanjay Dutt, Nagma, Smriti Irani, Shatrughan Sinha, Preity Zinta, Raj Babbar, Jaya Bachhan, Jaya Prada, Azharuddin et-al have been thrown inside a stadium and the politicos have pitched their tents on the ringside. Each camp now does an inspired version of Jai ho to decide who gets whom...
" aaja, aaja jind mere shaamiyane ke tale, aaja zari waale neele aasman ke tale, Jai ho, Jai Ho!"
Scene 10 : The silent era hero emerges now. Prakash Karat who has been inconsipicuous and vague all this while, decides to break his self imposed silence. but just about..

"Mere dil mein aaj kya hai, tu kahe toh main batadoon, teri zulf phir sawaroon, teri maang phir saja doon...."

The only problem is one doesnt know whether he is singing this to Massakali or to Sonia or Mamta.

As the beats get louder, the incentives to join and leave parties are on in full swing. The bizarre scenario is devoid of any agenda, vision or credibility. Its just replete with opportunistic alliances, which we will soon be told are for the better-ment of the country. As the aam junta, we are expected to be blind, dumb & deaf and need to nod our heads vigorously as the cunning gorees, the corrupt chaila's and their hideous and asinine sidekicks deliver their sermons.

For the next 60 days till polling is over, all alliance partners will profess their undying love for each other by performing the ultimate poll dance to climax - "Mahi we, muhabattan sachiyan ne, mangda naseeba kucch hor hai..."

and heap scorn on and trade charges with the opposing parties.

- Soon to start will be Poll dance 2 - the season for new improved promises and slogans. More on that later.

Till then enjoy as they perform, "Koi hamse jeet na paawe, chale chalo, chale chalo, jo aave woh mit jaawe, chale chalo...!

The barrier breaking Mozart

I was destined to write about Rahman - when about 20 days ago,i first saw slumdog. I held back that blog superstitiously so that nothing went wrong on oscar day. Infact, i almost felt that my faith in him was on trial that morning.

The fact that he is India's best or a master at his craft is indisputable. The fact that he propogates love or follows sufi-ism is less known. I have always believed that to succeed one needs oodles of good luck and good wishes apart from pure talent. Rahman enjoys unbridled affection from the masses, gratitude from the scores of artists that he has promoted and launched, silent salutes even from his competitors and in general does not attract malice even from hardened critics. ' Cause he himself is apolitical, friendly and work oriented. His own conduct is above board, always. Thats why, he carries with him and benefits from the zillion good wishes of people around the world.

Through the last decade and a half, he has broken 3 radical barriers. First, he shattered the language barrier, that prompted even soaked in rajma chawal kind of punjabis like me to buy tamil cassettes (CDs were not in those days) of Roja, Thiruda-Thiruda, Gentleman and Bombay. This is 2 years before he debuted in Bollywood with Rangeela and Bombay.

Then he transcended the Class barrier appealing to the hoi polloi in Kamla Nagar, Virar & Tamabaram as well as to the swish set in Malabar Hill, GK-II & Poes Garden. Many wd remember how crass hindi film music was in the late 80's and early 90's with the likes of Bappi Lahiri and Anu malik going hammer and tongs at our eardrums and sensibilities. Rahman's lilting ditties came like a breath of invigorating mountain air. Irrespective of whether it was the fast paced -Humma-Humma or Chaiyaa Chaiyya kind of numbers or the slower and languid Tu hi re, Ghanan-Ghanan or Dil Se Re kind of classic melodies - His music appealed ! Period.

Now he has surpassed the geographical barrier. Only time will tell - how successful he will be. But having observed his craft and his attitude, there is no reason why he wouldnt be ruling the world charts in a couple of years.

To me his success has come from the rapidly changing sound of his music - every few years. His first crop of 10-15 films had one kind of sound (Roja, Gentleman, Thiruda-Thiruda, Bombay, Rangeela, etc). Then came Lagaan, Dil Se, Earth, Zubeida, Pukaar, Taal, etc which had another genre of sound altogether. When u felt that this was it - came Saathiya, Swades, Yuva, Rang De Basanti and Guru etc which again changed the formula. The current sound of his music - as in Jaane Tu, Ghajini, Slum Dog and Delhi 6 is perhaps the fouth distinctive and different genre that i have heard from him. In fact, one hears a fresh sound every time that one hears Rahman. Its a sound that your ears and brain are not accustomed to. This i believe is also the reason why his music normally takes time to grow. But grow it does.

The detailing in his orchestration is remarkable. So are the subtle and not so subtle changes in song tempo. For about the last 4-5 years, there is almost an absence of the conventional mukhda and antaras in his songs. Sometimes it is disorienting but at most times, one loves the end product.

Every movie of his has a unique score that just cant be replaced with anything else. Cant even imagine Jodha Akbar or Jaane Tu or Lagaan or Guru with any different music (Jai ho from slumdog is apparently an exception because it seems it was created for a subhash ghai movie who in his wisdom decided not to use it). Have always felt that his music and background scores complement and uplift the onscreen proceedings substantially.

I feel his slower tracks, bhajans, lorees and love ballads are much better than his fast paced numbers. The latest in this series is from Ghajini - kaise mujhe tu mil gayee..

One of the many contributors to the fresh quality in his music also stems from his frequent use of raw singers. Artists of the calibre of Hema Sardesai (Awaara Bhawre), Richa Sharma (a song in Zubeida that i cant recall), Sapna Awasthi and Sukhwinder Singer (Chaiyaa-Chaiyya), Naresh Iyer (Roobaroo..), benny Dayal (Masakali), another new singer(Kabhi Kabhi aditi) have all made their debuts with his music.

What makes him so endearing apart from his work, is his trademark graciousness & humility. Just after the oscars, i heard him comment to one of the news channels that if he cd, he would rip the award into two and share it with one of the other nominees for he admired his work..I have also seen him openly talk about other Indian music directors in an admiring and complementary manner. These are signs - i guess- not just of maturity but of large heartedness, of love and of someone who has transcended and conquered his ego.

To me, his music is a reflection of this clean and endearing personality and thats why i love it.

He has already paralelled what RDBurman has been to millions of Indians for decades. Maybe he will now go beyond and be the new Mozart for billions across the world.

I eagerly look forward to all his new music releases like a school kid. I find his songs difficult to sing though. While it may be too late for me to attempt singing, just wish that i cd become half as gracious and large hearted as him.

Dilli ka khoon-Main bhi Schumi

As a true blue punjabi from dilli, i often do things on the road, that my friends from other cities cant fathom.

For instance, "jumping traffic signals"- The red light is usually and the amber light is always nothing but a directive to my brain to step up harder on the accelarator. If i cd help it, i would even cock a snook at the policeman at the junction.

"No parking signs" are things that i am usually oblivious to. These are meant for those who understand Written english. I do read english, but the brain just does not comprehend and respond to some words. "No Parking" is one of them. To me, usually, it appears like an open invitation to park my vehicle right in front of it so that atleast others cant see it at all and be saved from the inconvenience of searching for other locations to park or having to walk longer after parking.

"Zebra crossings" is one more such unfathomable sign - in fact, i use the parallel white lines as a test for my driving skills where i try and steer the vehicle such that the wheels dont touch the white painted surface at all. Pedestrians scarcely understand this and they always seem to be coming in for a closer look.

"No turn" as a sign is a complete waste. Have never understood why i should take the entire 2 km extra stretch to turn around and come back when i can simply turn where i want to. so if there is just a traffic light and no policeman, kiski majaal ke mujhe rok le!!

In general, like every punjabi, in anycase, i am a born schumi. its just that the cars at my disposal dont always respond like Ferraris. Also, there are just too many red lights on the way and too many people milling around.

Given my rather genteel demeanour overall, I have rarely been able to rationally explain to myself why my body and brain comprehend road signs and directions differently and get me to behave in a manner that one would not normally associate with me. Maybe, it is just in my khoon to question anything that is either limiting, offensive or restrictive or plainly not in my interest.

There are of-course other things as well which are part of my Dilli ka khoon - such as - love for street food & movies, for arguing and criticizing, and for advising all and sundry. But more on that later!

The Buffalo Brigade

As elections near yet again, the familiar buffalo brigade is raring to join the original 24 carat UP buffalo, in the race to help prop a friendly government.

The legendary UP buffalo, the one with diamonds and musclemen in equal measure is not alone anymore.

Right in front, clad in a crumpled white saree, from the land of feesh and fut-ball is the bengali buffalo, also called didi buffalo. Raucous, ugly and clumsy, this one specialises in creating roadblocks every time it sees a smooth road. Any time, it sights any inkling of progress or development, within a 500 km radius of its stable, it goes on a "hungaar strike". Just when one would want to say "good riddance", it rises with its characteristic gait, only to lead its entire herd. Protesting, gheraoing, shouting and vandalism is its forte. Most often, its herd is struggling to figure what they are protesting against.

The bengali buffalo has the avowed objective to take us back to the era of bullock carts, hartaals and in general to the 19th century.

Just a step behind, is the rare breed from the land of filter caaffee, sambhar and thahir saadam- the fair madraaasi buf-falo. This one is an english speaking, cultured, SUV travelling buffalo, that loves sarees, handbags, jewellery, sandals and lipstick. The problem is that no matter what it wears, it still looks like a buffalo. Also called the Amma buffalo, unlike others, this one loves progress, as long as it can be credited to her and helps her buy land and more sae-rees. It wears a strange cloak, that folklore suggests is to conceal its very strong body odour. It also protests any acts of development especially those undertaken by other madrasi buffalos of the male and 80 yr plus kind. It cohabitates with other physically similar female buffaloes, amongst other things. This one would like to take india to the 21st century as lonng as yit can be created by har in tamilnadu wonly.

Marching at the back of this brigade is the silent, lazy and the extremely fertile - bihari buffalo, also called the bhow-jee buffallo. This one was originally reared only to help multiply. It usually moos only with its partner around. It specialises in ruling in absentia. It is as opposed to any progress as the bengali buffalo but does not believe in protesting as much. It leaves that job to its hubby. Actually, it does not even bother to aquire any views on anything. It is not sure whether it likes or dislikes anything. Pls understand, that takes just too much effort. Ideally this one would like to have india in the 17th century. Bullock carts and village life would be blissful.

But Leading this brigade is the original italian buffalo. This one after 20 years has finally perfected the art of waving its hands as wipers but is still struggling to speak extempore. Affectionately called "Madam buffalo", this one either looks left or right or to its young ones, when in need of direction. Surprisingly, it pretends to be a reincarnation of Mother india and some other buffalos even believe it. Its objective is to set up factories in distant amethi or raibareilley and never be obstructed by the UP buffaloes. It loves to lead, nevermind, what others think of its origin, accent or intellect. It is rumoured that its other side is that of a wicked, conniving queen that knows how to bow others into meek submission.

Somewhere in between is the fast talking, fast walking, the overly melodramatic hyderabadi buffalo. It would like indians to do " pub bharo andolans" in their spare time as a sign of protesting against radical groups!! In its free time, it is usually found sauntering in the lawns of the Italian buffalo.

It is unfortunate that no matter which buffalo supports whom and which one forms the government, we have to jhaelo these cattle brained creatures for God knows how long. All of them, without exception would like to believe that india is an anarchic cowshed, where they could demonstrate their bovine qualities and multiply unfettered. Their physical and behavioural similarities to the buffalo notwithstanding, how the hell does one transform them into leaders who would fight justifiably for their people - giving them a better life and a better future.
Maybe we should make a beginning by demanding to know their policy, their stated views on india's foreign affairs, their approach on matters of internal security, an approach on how to handle groups like the ram sena or the bajrang dal, on freedom of speech and expression for artists, for women, for pub going people, their views on how to improve infrastructure, public transport, public health, sanitation etc. And how would they manage the budget?

It is one thing to indulge in empty buffalo talk and quite another to make specific and implementable plans for their people. We need leaders, we can look up to. We need an obama here! No buffalo brigade please. Not this time.

The Slumdog lion

Finally, i managed to catch Slumdog over the weekend. After all the self proclaimed "critically acclaimed" mess's that i saw over the last 4-6 weeks, Slumdog was astonishing and riveting cinema. Every moment, every scene pulled me in deeper, into a world, we as middle class indians are familiar with and yet dismissive of and distant from. No melodrama, no tears, no glossy images, no bizarre humour. Just stark reality in its uninhibited, plausible and most credible street avataar.

This was a reality that we have glossed over or literally passed by multiple times, or seen through tinted filters in typical potboilers. It is not a tale that happened 100 years ago in a distant land -ala lagaan or Australia or a story of poverty or dejection or loss - ala several Satyajit ray movies. It is a contemporary story of love, of hope and of triumph set in mumbai. Lets not get overly defensive about the kind of India that it portrays. This underbelly exists for everybody to see, every single day. And if a western director uses this as his canvas, we only need to salute his vision rather than support conspiracy theories by the likes of Arindam Chaudhary or Amitabh Bachhan before his u turn. Those who are so damn concerned, should help change lives of even one slum child. If reality is altered or refined, films would follow suit.

There has been some criticism that this movie is not Indian. Believe me, if this movie is not indian, nothing can be. It is just that, it is not directed or produced by our Chopras, Johars or Kapoors and thats not good news for them. There are no love ballads, no item songs and no romance in the "bollywood way" we know. But the formula of lost and found, and of everlasting love and the bollywood spirit is intact.

There isn't a character or setting or dialogue in the movie that we cant relate to or that doesnt move you or stay with you. That is a huge accomplishment for any kind of cinema.

To me, Slumdog is also a celebration of indian talent - the sound editor the slum kids, Freida Pinto, dev Patel, several others in cameo appearances, the mumbai setting, dialogues and the Rahman music. His background score, as usual (do forget Ghajini though) is outstanding. Its difficult to fathom whether the impact wd have been as high with a less than perfect score.

Whether this movie and specifically Rahman win the oscars is of academic interest. What matters is that they have done a great job. I loved "O-saya" and the way it contributes to the film. "Jai Ho" though not an integral part , helps complete the experience. My personal vote wd go to "O Saya" anyday. The western audiences might find the latter refreshing, though. Personally wd hate to see Rahman, or Freida or the sound editor getting confined to narrow regional tags about being from Chennai or Mumbai or Kerala. They are India's best - and available to the world.
Slum dog as a name is something that many people have taken offence to. I agree it is not part of us to talk derogatorily about other people in general. Calling slumkids -Lions wd perhaps be more appropriate!

God appointed Messiahs

There is nothing more off-putting than people who can interrupt your discussion before you have started. Worse, they pretend to know everything about everything ! They can out-mouth, out shout and out-gab anyone as sundry individuals run for cover, as they wd hv on sighting a dinosaur.

You cd be talking about the Nasa's new fangled moon orbiter or China's trade policy impact on the US or my wife's newest weight loss program or about the latest film release, Mr know-alls know exactly when and how to butt in and when to hi-jack the conversation.

over the past few years, my reactions have ranged from amazement to amusement. lately its given way to anger. Patience is obviously not a virtue and the hope that their lung power wd soon exhaust gets belied as fresh air supplies make way to their inflated bodies.

have noticed and made a laundry list of vital clues that help describe and identify such folk.

a) Tiny Ears - they have such limited listening skills that i wonder why God gave them ears at all - the objective of this organ in their bodies is to pick up signals of where the next conversation has started. Thats all. post that the ear automatically shuts itself off! Am sure NASA is still to pick up this trait of human evolution.
b) Large sleepy eyes - Strange but true. Even with extra large eyes, their poor observation skills, are inexplicable. For nothing can explain their lack of observation of others' discomfort when they hold fort!
c) Large bodies - most such people i know of have relatively large bodies. Maybe a function of all the air intake they have to subject their bodies to, to keep them activated..
d) Info hounds - They fall in the category of people who seek information, gossip, and anything that can help in their next monologue almost like a hound seeks blood. But for this information seeking, they read precious little. Most info sought is informal - relying more on ready to please colleagues, old aquaintances or overheard casual snippets of other people's conversations.

e) No head movement -they have the amazing knack of keeping their head absolutely constant almost like a rishi delivering his discourse while ordinary folk pay obeisance.

f) Mr Popular -In their own minds, if they ran for elections, everyone else wd forfeit their deposit, for ideally no one wd stand opposite them anyway. And if they did, they wd still win hands down as the entire junta wd vote only for them. They know every body and everybody knows them. You talk about the PM - and they wd know him. You talk about the head of a large MNC, and he wd have been playing golf with them just last month. You talk about a film star and he wd be known either to their uncle or aunt or may have casually dropped by to say hi when he was having lunch in an exotic restaurant. I mean, SRK's popularity is just so overhyped, in comparison!
In their minds, even casual aquaintances are good friends who wd stop at nothing to promote them, recommend them and go out of their ways, even leaving their own jobs to help them.

f) Outwardly patient - It is weird that they are able to maintain a calm and composed outword posture when actually they literally have ants in their pants, dying to jump into any discussion, no matter how little the provocation or invitation - almost like little children willing to frolic in the rain with little regard to anything else. The only problem is that they are little no more.

g) God appointed Messiahs -they always manage to increase my faith in God not because they pretend to be the local, nukkad wala-easily available messiah - some one who talks with the authority of the almight himself, with the intention of soothing the lives of the hoi-polloi. But because, everytime i have to go through their discourse, i beg God to send angels to deliver us of these messiahs first.

Oh lord, do listen to my prayers!

Lord Ram, women, pubs and videotape

We live in times where fact and fiction are no strangers and reality is weird-er than the weirdest dreams ! How else could one explain urban, educated girls from good families being pushed, shoved and abused - for being in a pub with friends and ostensibly chilling out. Or school students and their parents being chased by goons for singing songs in a language the goons did not approve of. That these incidents happened not in some part of unlettered, rural and media dark india, but shockingly in Mangalore and Nasik - cities known for their bustling medical, Engineering and management student fraternity, and for being strong trading and business destinations.

To me, the shame was not just that such incidents happened, because in every society there are and would continue to be people who think and act differently from the mainstream. The greater shame is in the almost grudging response of the government.

Groups such as MNS and the Sriram Sena represent another face of terror, perhaps as lethal as the Al-Qaida or the Lashkar-E-Taiba. There aim may not be to maim or kill innocents. But the philiosphy they espouse and seek to perpetrate is as reprehensible.

I cant bear to think of a time when more of such people would be telling us what kind of restaurants we should visit. Continental or chineese food could invite being dragged by the hair as it is "un-indian"; watching the latest English movie or play could lead one into being slapped on the face 'cause it could be hurting our culture and ethics. And listening to songs other than in the chosen language could lead to us being targeted by violent mobs!!

Coercing people at large into unquestioned acceptance of their faith, their beliefs and sometimes into inane things such as their music, their food and their choice of what represents Indian culture deserves not lip service condemnation but the severest form of corporal punishment.

Why should the penalty applicable to them be any less stringent or unrepentant as for Kasab?

life imprisonment awarded to few such individuals, would greatly diminish the frequency of such incidents. Equally, a half hearted response such as the one we are witnessing now from the government would encourage more such hounds to go on with their half baked ideas and agendas.
Ancient Indian culture and texts are replete with references to liquor consumption amongst ordinary women folk as well as royalty. Lord Ram never ever stood for dragging women by their hair, slapping them cruelly, molesting them or curbing their independence of view and action. The basic tenet that such "culture taliban" seek to defend is infirm and invalid.

If this is what political parties like the BJP and Congress stand for, we must express our contrary opinion and displeasure strongly enough to ensure that politically motivated views, opinions and actions are openly debated, debunked and shamed.
we deserve better.

The secrets of Bournville

One of the nicer ads on TV these days is for Cadbury's Bournville chocolates. Good story, decent execution and clear message takeout - atleast thats what i initially thought! whats even better is that all in the family ranging from 7 to 41 seemed to like it.
Yet we have had our reasons not to buy it so far -
my youngest daughter, 7 felt that the big "dino-saurish" bird wd come and take her if she ate it in the open.
the older one at 11, felt that she had not done so well in her regular class tests and she had not earned it.
Wife felt that it was just too rich and fattening and sin should ideally be postponed as long as possible.
and @ rs 75/pc, i felt it was far too expensive for an indian chocolate and hence avoidable!
so much for clear advtsg messages and consumer understanding!

The Buffalo turned 53!

The Buffalo turned 53!!

No diamonds or fushcia this time,

A pink n Silver outfit under leather

barely concealing its abundant glee!

The lavish cake, the collected zillions,

the public tamasha and teeming minions,

were all there!

Remember,

the actual bash happened earlier;

a sundry engineer thrashed to death!

but "chelaa's" and moolah aplenty,

made it escape the net...

yet again.

Yet again, allowing it to ride rough-shod

over people and land,

south of himalayan slopes;

looting, extorting, killing,

breaking norms and dashing hopes.

The buffalo's wicked run continues..

and so does its wicked smile.

Stop it, or else, the PM's chair

cd soon fall to its guile!

Think. Just think of the day,

if the buffalo were to be PM

Filth, chaos, murder, mayhem..

Save us Oh, lord. Pray !!!

Hilarious "President"

Mananaged to catch " The President is coming" over the weekend.
absolutely hilarious stuff.
no great production values, no music, no starcast - not in the conventional way atleast..and yet its witty-sarcastic dialogue, and sense of fun running through it had us in splits - almost throughout.
each character was so aptly cast and did a perfect job.
Standout stuff! must watch!

Raju Hazir Ho

Mulzim No 420, Ramalinga Raju hazir ho....o...o.

Ever imagined what cd have prompted an erudite technocrat to call his company "truth"? It cd have been a reflection of his lofty ideals in his youth for I cant imagine that several years ago he wd have envisioned running his company on principles that are on the wrong side of law.

Obviously, these ideals have disappeared now.

The fact that he lied is now well known. But that a man - like you and me - by education, training and experience - chooses to mis-lead his trusted employees, shareholders and junta at large into an abyss of filth is alarming. To assume that he was doing it only to protect his shareholding - wd be naive. But did his mis-doings ever prick his conscience?

Obviously he did this at a stretch for many years. what i am really keen to understand is how did he do it the first time and overcome the call of his conscience? was it in a typical filmy way, where, buoyed by the success of his first misadventure, of not getting caught, he continued to dig deeper and deeper and the call of his conscience kept getting buried inside?
My theory is that he was completely overwhelmed by the power-attitude-personality troika that has been the undoing for so many before him.

a) Absolute POWER - of money, coupled with the backing of a political establishment much more powerful than him - Chandrababu Naidu who supported through his initial years ; and YSR Reddy who guarded him in his latter years, even delaying his arrest to enable him to put his house in order. when you have friends who cd change the environment for you -why wd anyone bother ?
b) Attitude - "manage kar lenge" - the confidence that he would be able to smoothly slide out of any situation may have been the cornerstone of his intrinsic belief that he wd survive. after all "money buys everything" ? manage kar lenge !! This is not confidence but a complete lack of respect for any norm that civil society follows - masquerading as self confidence.
c) Warped Values - Crossing the thin line between what is right and what is not, is reflective of a warped upbringing; of values that tilt in favour of :" how the world shd see it" and not "what is right" ; it is reflective of a personality ridden with an inferiority complex that equates blind ambition with Money and power, failing to understand that credibility, self respect and character need probably higher weightage.

that these three are a deadly combination is proven time and again - by every single despicable politician who gets caught crossing this thin line.

We all strive to go beyond what we have, or beyond what we have achieved. But going beyond recognised norms of honour, respect, scruples and of ethics -is something we dont attempt. The difference between the Rajus of the world and many others including people like us is not in the scale of our ambition or our confidence- but in the importance that we attatch to our ingrained values. Maybe our relatively contented nature and respect for self and others makes us what we are and makes raju - what he is.

Some say, that they were surprised that an educated industrialist did something like this. Ask anybody who has seen companies work up close and personal. There are lots of rajus out there !
Maybe, the humbling experience in jails wd do them some good.

did Australia

• Over the weekend, in keeping with my fine run on the latest flicks, did "Australia", an english movie, that makes one feel that Joddha Akbar was a breeze in comparison. At a running time of 3 hrs plus, it felt uncannily akin to a typical Bollywood masala in several parts -including the climax, which believe me, each one of us wd have seen a zillion times over in Hindi movies.
  
  This love tale of Hugh Jackman (Drover) and Nicole Kidman (Lady Ashley) was set in 1939, against a backdrop of aboriginals and the stolen generation in Oz, culminating with the bombing of Darwin (post pearl harbour). Interesting and insightful stuff. But it seriously dragged in parts and atleast twice when one felt that the movie was over, it continued to meander on.
  Everytime i began snoozing (forgive me, we were in the 10pm show), was woken up by oohs, aahs and wows- from the adjoining seat (wife) and from the seat next to her (a friend). all these expressions of pure admiration were reserved for Hugh jackman. Good, tough looking guy. And if good horse riding is equivalent to good acting, he did a swell job. Were there any facial expressions that i missed ? (actually honestly, good body language, and screen presence). Nicole Kidman's role, in comparison, was rather bland and she managed to make it marginally better than insipid !
  
  If there is one part that makes the movie a must see - its the entire sequence of over 1500 cattle running amok over what seemed like a huge cliff...(was that the great barrier reef?). Outstanding stuff.
  one hoped that music cd have played a meatier role. there was surely space and need for it.

Abhi to mein jawan hoon

saw an article in Brand Equity this morning and thought that it wd be apt to put my two penny bit as well..

That trimming away of white hair in the moustache, that face cream or face pack to hide away the fine lines, the gaming arcades that we so grudgingly love, young movies like Rock on, Jaane Tu..., that visit to the nearby gym, often repeating that being forty something is nothing more than a mere statistic and that latching on to comments on one's George Clooney looks (i loved this one!) even if they were in passing - all scream our (mine for sure) quest for "Y-O-U-T-H". if the 40 something crowds at VLCC, talwarkar's or Kaya ; the "treatment" seekers at Ayush, Soukya or other SPAs, and those crowding niche apparel and lifestyle stores are any indication - then the focus on maintaining, preserving and projecting youth overrides any real concern for fitness or health. In fact these tend to be the more convenient alibi's rather than the intrinsic drivers for action.

Those ahead in this pack are seen as those who need to project the most...aka people like me in their late thirties to early fifties.

But Why?

I guess purely because even while the age clock might be ticking, the hair might be George Clooney, and wrinkles may be preparing to appear, the mind is still stuck at that magic number (in my case @ 25.) Unmindful, the heart, mind and soul continue to sing a more youthful and peppy tune!

a) When people like me were 25, the options for things that we so desperately cling on to now - like those of eating out, of classy yet youthful apparel, of gaming options, of mobiles, sunglasses, cars, bikes and other gadgets, of fitness gyms, etc - were far more limited.

b) Even more limited was money in our pockets. It was the start of our careers at a time when india hadnot yet fully liberalised and salaries were yet to zoom. The desire to save for an impending marriage (either one's own or in the family), to buy stuff for the house and other basics was far more intense than to project any image. Whatever was left was to binge drink with friends.

c) Just as limited was our exposure to the internet, to vacation getaways and to all good things in life !

But now that we have learnt to like, to differentiate and to enjoy certain things, the heart doesnt want to let go. we want more of these. Honestly, not because we care about what perception or image our sartorial, epicurean or other preferences would create. But, because our choices are simply reflective of our acquired or innate confidence; of having travelled a certain distance in our lives and the fact that we care less about what others think of our preferences now. if they are perceived as youthful, great!

so if a friend announces to the world and celebrates her 40th birthday in great style, it doesnt raise our brows any more; another friend, unmindful of his near baldness dresses to kill the world, he is only being a rock star. and a third visits a gym to get rid of his never dis-appearing paunch, he is only being an icon that other 40 yr olds can emulate. In a way, what most of us seem to be doing now is what we could not do in good measure earlier! And as long as we have the inclination & desire and the resources, why not ?

But seriously, what matters is the ideologocal and not the biological age. whether we feel, think and act young is far more critical than whether we look young. As, anyways, on the ground, young imagery changes little. Projecting "youthfulness" in no way alters how the real 20-mid 30's see us. It only marginally alters the perception of those who are either our peers or those who are older or less youthful than us. and that too till the time that ideological age takes over.

There are those who talk about ageing gracefully and i subscribe to that as well. As i see it, the concepts of maintaining, preserving and projecting youthfulness & ageing gracefully are not necessarily mutually exclusive.

kyonki Baal chaahe safed ho jaaye, dil jawaan rehna cha-hi-yye.

Koi Farhan ko bulao...

The last week had us watching two mega block busters- Rab ne...and Ghajini in quick succession. One - an almost diabetic romance, the other a bone breaking revenge saga. There were mega differences between the two and yet there were some intrinsic similarities..

a) "Ab" 6 bhulao, 8 banao - In the battle of the abs of SuperKhans in their mid forties, 8 pacs delivered a knockout punch, looking all beefed up and fresh. 6 pacs have begun to look jaded.

b) Thodi punjabi, kunjam madrasi - each film presented a nubile debutant leading lady - who looked fresh and emoted decently, except that one was a punjaban and other probably madrasi. One was just about better than an average looking, while the other carried the hangover of tamil films in her make up and dialogue delivery. But despite that, her charm would probably carry her further than the former.

c) Wah kya treatment tha - Top of the line production values with great cinematography, in your face effects, laudable background scores and taut editing etc gave both films the required glitzy and glossy feel.

d) mujic thanda tha - music in both films disappointed - with the Rahman score for Ghajini, a bigger culprit.

e) Kamzor Kahaani mein zabardast twist ..... - While one was about bigamy and cheating in its subtext, its sweet as honey crust quite successfully camoflauged the core. The other was a cleverly intertwined saga of violence and romance that often became gory and repulsive. Despite the intrinsic differences in plot, both had their moments of charm and plot twists that showcased that talented directors, can engage the audience even with sub par stories. However, if one comes out of the theatre feeling cheated - it is because both films focus excessively on showcasing the acting prowesses of their respective lead stars.

The weak link in both were the rather imperfectly baked stories itself.

(and by the way in both -rationale, logic etc "dhoondte reh jaoge..")

f) "inescapable - unmissable - must see" - both films used high decibel efforts to create an aura that lured poor mice like us into believing that the pied pipers were going to play the world's best symphonies. But with great hype, comes great expectations and bigger disappointment as well..

For me, one was ugghh -tooo sweet for comfort, the other was aar...ghh...toooo violent.

purely for the record, if i was forced to recommend one of these, it wd be ughh...Rab Ne- not because it was any better but because of its unabashed display of punjabiyat - so intrinsic to me.

But honestly, instead, can some one ask Farhan to come back soon..?!!

It has to be Rock On ....anyday!

Gaming lesson

Howsoever much we hate to admit, the fact that we can learn so much from our own children, is irrefutable. just the other day, a couple of weeks ago, i noticed my daughter, playing a game on my mobile. That, that game ever existed on a piece of equipment owned by me was itself news to me -and that she was enjoying it so much annoyed me as much as it attracted me to it. I, ofcourse passed of my ignorance on games as something which was juvenile.

I decided to push and teach myself that game. And push i did. My first score of 10K on that game had me jumping like a little school boy, only to realise a couple of minutes later, that my top score wasnt even the top 5 scores, all of which were in the name of my daughter. Her top score was then some 20K odd and the lowest in the top 5 was 17K.

I persevered and probably played more on my mobile than my kids did. Not surprisingly, with every passing game, my skill level improved. Soon i had topped her score and was proudly showing off my name -right on top of the list, to all in the family.
My daughter, the calm soul, within a day, raised the bar for me to 27K.
I loved the challenge that she had thrown at me. This time i upped the ante to 35K, then 41K and finally 46K. But everytime, that i achieved a score, it did not take her even 24 hrs to bypass it and set me a new more challenging target.
She was loving the challenge more than me and feeding off it.
She continued to raise the bar first to 50 odd K and then to 71K and finally to 112K.
Today we routinely do scores of 200K plus on this silly game. She is still the leader with a top score of 256K and me at 252K. What is interesting is that a month ago i couldnt even fancy my chance of learning this game or scoring even a 10K!

Everytime, i was bypassed, i was making a mental note on what i needed to do better.
But more often, i was meekly following her score and was focused on improving upon that. What she was doing was passing on some invaluable lessons to a man who was nearly 3 decades older than her.

lesson 1 -dont rest on your laurels. what u have achieved was yesterday. today presents a new fresher and higher challenge.

lesson 2 - dont get bogged down because you have been by-passed. Enjoy the challenge. If you try and believe in yourself, there is no reason why you cant achieve the same goal or better it considerably.

lesson 3 - Your target is limited by your mindset, not by your abilities - you achieve what you want to, not what you are capable of. We first though 50K was unachievable, then were convinced that 100K was impossible. Crossing 150K was never going to happen and 200K was beyond us. But we successfully crossed each hurdle and never loked back.
So set your sights higher. Aim for the moon, you are sure to reach there someday.

lesson 4 - keep trying. because thats the only way life has created.

The fact that this lesson came with almost no baggage, no screaming or preaching and so calmly made it all the more endearing. With all humility i take in these lessons.